A New Years Resolve | When was the Beginning

As I sit this morning recollecting the past year’s journey, I find so many signs and wonders of the Lord’s coming to fruition in my life. I woke and made my Past Year’s post on Facebook. A basic little application offering highlighted posts from the past 365 days. Giving a second to meditate on what had transpired. Scanning through pictures of the last twelve months, it came to me so clearly. I was tired for many good reasons and it dismissed my feelings of regret. I had come from somewhere this past year. I had accomplished so much. But now, I was ready to be reborn. I was ready to be re-enlightened. I was ready to be breathed into with a fresh sense of awareness and hope that the new year will bring promise. I was ready and prepared.

The year 2014 brought much tribulation, stress, and strife. My son who has now separated himself from his mothers waning teet and had in just a year’s time delivered himself into the world as an independent adult. He joined the military, the Army specifically, gained his footing in the world as a soldier and has most recently devoted his life and heart by order of engagement to a young woman. His visit home this season brought the realizations that he is now his own. As I dropped him and his fiancé’ off at her home after dinner, it came to me, I will never tuck my boy into bed, kiss his soft forehead, come to his cry in the middle of the night or tend a new morning yawn again. I realized that this transformation reminded me of his birth when he left my body causing pain and agony. That this too, this delivery from my home, my wing, was just as painful as when he left my womb. Now, he is David, still my son, but a man who steps to his own destiny.

As I began to pray, seeking the Lord for guidance; I summoned him to bring me to an epiphany. I searched the scripture by flapping through pages and landing quietly in Matthew, Chapter 23-26. I had hoped to find a word that would strengthen the vision I had experienced just a week’s time ago while waking abruptly in the wee hours of a morning. There was something about to happen. After this long year of trials and change, building a business, strengthening a daughter who was struggling with teenage tasks and delivering a son into this world, I needed to know that I was still on a path of personal salvation. A way in which I still had purpose and meaning. A hope that there was more joy to have and more work to do.

Matthew:24:21
for then there will be a great tribulation, such as has not occurred since the beginning of the world until now, nor ever shall.

As I read through Chapters 23-26, I heard the story of the days, as told by Matthew, before the Passover and the final deliberations that Jesus gave to us to consider before his death and resurrection. I related to the words given to the scribes, the Pharisees, as he called them hypocrites. I knew as I prepare for a new year that He, the Almighty, was speaking to me while he works me toward my purposes. Recently I had portrayed my anger and frustrations towards the world’s churches during fellowship with my dad. I told him that I felt church leaders only fall away the feet of those searching for the Grace of God! That they lead them into despair with no hope. Keeping from them the good news and leaving them to think that they receive forgiveness by their own flesh and doings, and not simply by the grace and mercy of our Heavenly Father! I physically heat up in emotional thoughts when I think about the Priests sending down judgment upon the heads of the believers only for their own name sake to cause strife and worry in the church. How the bride is being raped of her gold with wicked tongues of fake promises and riches of the world. How religions cause the eyes of the weak to fix their gaze upon everything that is not right in themselves so as to cause them to fall into a coma of self-doubt and consistent shame. These are the idols of the people. The monarchy that will fall. For any one of us who lead, must lead the hearts and eyes to simply look at their Father as he will do the rest in their confirmed and freely given salvation!

As I read on I noticed the verse I mentioned above. In relation to the deliberations that Christ spoke, He reminds us to constantly prepare for the end days. He tells us to be constantly ready or to have readiness as the disciples asked him what the signs would be that he was coming.  He tells us to be weary of false prophet, when nation rises against nation. He speaks of the time when many will fall away and hate one another. That these times of tribulations, (meaning a time distress or suffering resulting from oppression or persecution; also : a trying experience) would be the signs that he is coming. And that the time in the beginning, the time when Adam ate of the Tokogae, (Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil), was the time that the tribulation began.

As I ponder on where my journey will take me, I know that there will be many times of stress and strife, of tribulation. It is in these times I know he is coming, he is working for my good, bringing me salvation and rest. There are many things in which we are to fear in these times, but we are not to fear the tribulation as it is a sign, a wonder that the Lord Jesus Christ has not forsaken us! It a sign that he is coming to claim his bride! He, the One, says prepare yourselves as the virgins prepare for the wedding feast. Be prepared to sit in the dark and wait upon the bridegroom and have your oil flask to refill your lamp when it is time to burn the light. Meaning, keep your spirit prepared for him. Keep your light shining for others to see! And do not give in to the eyes of the flesh that become heavy and you sleep whilst you are to be guarding  your soul. Stay vigilant in prayer and seeking Him.

My Father in heaven comes for me and I am ready. Ready to do whatever the will be of the Lord. In the hopes that I will continue to let Christ’s light shine through me so that others can see what He has made!

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